Heart rate rapid.

I desperately wanted to sleep but my hips are aching like hell. This is so not fair. I just don’t understand after all the torment I endured I get two bad hips on top of it all? Sometimes I feel like life is playing a joke on me. Always the Jester never the King. I am just so afraid of having to get my hips replaced. I barely have any movement now. What’s going to happen after they operate? I honestly don’t know what I will do if I ever become immobile. That’s fear more paralyzing than the normal imaginary anxieties I conjure up in my brain. Man, I didn’t want to write about this but my fingers won’t stop. I get more and more anxious the more I think about it. I need a klonopin now.

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